Most relationships begin with the excitement of falling in love, dreaming of a future together—maybe with a couple of kids and a dog, creating the perfect picture of a happy family. However, what people rarely imagine is what happens if that love, respect, and admiration change into something far from a fairytale and even turn into dysfunction. If you find yourself in this situation, there are important things to consider before making the life-changing decision to divorce.

The best place to start is by looking in the mirror. Have you truly done everything you can to make your marriage work? Your wedding vows were made with commitment and intention, not to be taken lightly. To avoid future regrets, make sure you've explored every avenue to save your relationship. Have you been completely honest with yourself about your feelings? Have you shared your thoughts, needs, and emotions openly with your spouse, or are you expecting them to read your mind? Have you suggested trying marriage counseling, and did you fully commit to the process? It’s important to give your all before making a decision that changes everything.

If you feel that you’ve truly done all you can and your relationship is beyond repair, it’s time to start looking toward the future. Are you prepared for a potential drop in your standard of living? It’s important to understand that the same income that once supported one household will now need to cover two, which often means both parties will experience a reduced standard of living. Now is the time to carefully assess what you can realistically afford moving forward. It may also be helpful to meet with a financial planner, like me, who can help you evaluate your options and explore what potential settlements might look like.

If you’re unsure about your financial situation, now is the time to get organized. Start by gathering all your financial documents so you have a clear picture of your household finances. Knowing how much money you have and understanding your living expenses are essential to planning for the next stage of your life. Consulting with a financial planner or a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst ® can provide valuable guidance during this time.



Take a moment to check your support network. Going through a divorce is one of the toughest challenges in life, and the process can take anywhere from six months to a year, or even longer. Surround yourself with people who will love and support you without judgment—you need that kind of encouragement now more than ever. Remember to take a deep breath and focus on taking one step at a time. You are stronger than you think, and you WILL get through this.