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1. Rediscovering "Me Time": You finally have time to focus on yourself—no more juggling everyone else’s schedules! Dive into hobbies, pamper yourself, or just enjoy the peace of doing absolutely nothing. 2. Freedom to Redecorate: Want to turn the spare room into a yoga studio or paint the walls bright pink? Go for it! Your space is yours to style however you please, without anyone else's input. 3. Sleeping Like a Starfish: Stretch out in your bed however you want—no snorers, no blanket hogs, just blissful, uninterrupted sleep. 4. Total Remote Control: From binging your favorite shows to watching guilty pleasures and sports, the remote is all yours. No more compromising on what to watch!  5. Financial Independence: Say goodbye to money arguments and hello to full control over your finances. You get to decide where every dollar goes, making it easier to focus on your own financial goals and dreams. Embrace these perks and make the most of this fresh start!

Yes, a divorce mediator can remain neutral because they are trained to understand and consider the needs of both parties. Mediators help each person address their concerns, such as child custody, property, finances, and other important issues. They guide the couple through discussions, helping them find a fair and peaceful resolution. Divorce is inherently stressful, but working with a mediator can significantly ease the emotional burden. Mediation allows you to handle personal matters in a private and supportive setting, rather than in a courtroom where decisions are made for you, not with you. This approach not only fosters more collaborative discussions but also helps you avoid the high costs and added stress of litigation, making the process more manageable and less overwhelming. Mediation also spares children from the stress of a courtroom setting, making the divorce process less traumatic for them. This is a significant benefit on its own. Additionally, divorce mediators offer greater flexibility in scheduling, allowing meetings at times that work best for everyone involved to address important issues. This flexibility helps make the entire process smoother and more accommodating to your needs. Meeting privately with a mediator helps manage the tension that often arises when discussing important issues like child custody and dividing assets. Although mediators don’t make decisions for you, they are experts at resolving conflicts and facilitating clear communication between spouses who may not see eye to eye. They keep conversations focused and productive, helping each spouse express their needs while ensuring both parties feel heard. Acting like a referee, the mediator uses techniques to defuse conflict and guide discussions, making it easier to navigate these highly emotional topics smoothly and respectfully. A divorce mediator plays a crucial role in safeguarding the financial interests of both parties. By collaborating with professionals like a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst ®, mediators ensure that clients receive expert guidance on their financial outcomes. A CDFA® helps by evaluating different settlement options, explaining their benefits, and advising on the most favorable ways to divide property. This partnership helps remove the uncertainty surrounding financial decisions, giving clients a clearer picture of their financial future after the divorce. Divorce is an emotionally charged and stressful time, making it challenging to make clear and logical decisions. It's crucial to avoid financial pitfalls during this period, and with the right guidance from a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst ® and mediator, you can better secure your financial future. These professionals work together to help you navigate complex financial issues, ensuring both parties are set up for stability as they transition into the next chapter of their lives. For assistance in finding a qualified divorce mediator, reach out to us at Contact Us | Pathway Divorce Solutions | Greendale, WI.

Most relationships begin with the excitement of falling in love, dreaming of a future together—maybe with a couple of kids and a dog, creating the perfect picture of a happy family. However, what people rarely imagine is what happens if that love, respect, and admiration change into something far from a fairytale and even turn into dysfunction. If you find yourself in this situation, there are important things to consider before making the life-changing decision to divorce. The best place to start is by looking in the mirror. Have you truly done everything you can to make your marriage work? Your wedding vows were made with commitment and intention, not to be taken lightly. To avoid future regrets, make sure you've explored every avenue to save your relationship. Have you been completely honest with yourself about your feelings? Have you shared your thoughts, needs, and emotions openly with your spouse, or are you expecting them to read your mind? Have you suggested trying marriage counseling, and did you fully commit to the process? It’s important to give your all before making a decision that changes everything. If you feel that you’ve truly done all you can and your relationship is beyond repair, it’s time to start looking toward the future. Are you prepared for a potential drop in your standard of living? It’s important to understand that the same income that once supported one household will now need to cover two, which often means both parties will experience a reduced standard of living. Now is the time to carefully assess what you can realistically afford moving forward. It may also be helpful to meet with a financial planner, like me, who can help you evaluate your options and explore what potential settlements might look like. If you’re unsure about your financial situation, now is the time to get organized. Start by gathering all your financial documents so you have a clear picture of your household finances. Knowing how much money you have and understanding your living expenses are essential to planning for the next stage of your life. Consulting with a financial planner or a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst ® can provide valuable guidance during this time.  Take a moment to check your support network. Going through a divorce is one of the toughest challenges in life, and the process can take anywhere from six months to a year, or even longer. Surround yourself with people who will love and support you without judgment—you need that kind of encouragement now more than ever. Remember to take a deep breath and focus on taking one step at a time. You are stronger than you think, and you WILL get through this.

FINALLY! After an emotional roller coaster, you receive that 8 ½ by 11 manila envelope with your divorce decree signed by the judge. You are officially single again. Whether you choose to celebrate or mourn, remember that there are still important tasks to take care of right away. Review Your Decree - First, make sure you fully understand the contents of your divorce decree and what has been awarded to you. You may need to prepare a Qualified Domestic Relations Order or QDRO to split a retirement plan. Don’t delay—start this process now to ensure a timely division of the account. This is also an excellent time to meet with a financial advisor to map out your new financial plan, open any new accounts, and consolidate any old ones. Review All Accounts- make sure to remove your ex-spouse’s name from all existing accounts, including utilities, bank accounts, credit cards, and insurance policies. If you don't have a credit card in your name alone, now is the time to get one. It's important to establish your own financial identity. Get Organized– If you don't already have one, set up a filing system for all your important financial documents and any statements you need to keep for taxes. If you're comfortable with technology, this system can be entirely electronic, but it's essential to have one in place. Review Estate Docs– Update all the beneficiaries on your accounts and insurance policies immediately. There have been horror stories of ex-spouses inheriting large 401(k) plans because someone forgot to make these updates. Write a New Will– Everything has changed, so make sure your new wishes are clear to avoid any confusion. If you had any trusts in place, you’ll need to terminate them and create new ones.  Receiving your final divorce decree marks the start of a new chapter in your life. While you might feel a mix of emotions, remember that this change can lead to a healthier, more well-rounded, and happier you. The administrative tasks may not be enjoyable, but with each step, you'll feel your new independence and identity taking shape, helping you to heal and grow. Embrace this opportunity to create a brighter future for yourself. Today marks a new beginning for you. Embrace it and make the most of this fresh start.

Many couples going through a divorce understand that some amount of spousal maintenance or alimony is necessary, but they often don't know how much or for how long it should be paid. Most attorneys will rely on your budget figures, but in my experience, these numbers are rarely accurate. Attorneys are also incentivized to get the best deal for their clients, so if you are the one paying alimony, they will argue for the lowest possible amount. Conversely, if you are the one receiving alimony, they will push for the highest possible amount. Fortunately, there is a better way to approach this issue! I am a big supporter of negotiated settlements, whether or not attorneys are involved. But how do you find the right amount for alimony? Here's how a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst® can help. We create a comprehensive financial projection for each party, looking 20 years into the future. This includes all expenses, income, assets, and liabilities. Essentially, we develop a full financial plan for each person based on the settlement agreement they are considering. When you have this detailed financial information in front of you, finding a fair and balanced alimony amount becomes much easier. Our goal is to ensure that both parties can transition into the next phase of their lives with confidence, knowing they will have the financial stability they envision for their futures. Give us a call . We are here to help.

It probably comes as no surprise that individuals who ultimately decide to divorce had their first thought about that possibility more than a year before it actually happens, and often many years before. Even with early signs, the decision to dissolve a marriage is a very tough one. Many choose to stay and only find resolution when their spouse, whom they’ve been thinking of leaving for so long, decides to leave them. Why does this happen? Why do we wait so long and sacrifice so much? While I’m not a psychologist, I have spent a lot of time understanding the complexities of divorce. Based on what I’ve learned from various experiences, it’s clear that this decision is incredibly difficult and deeply personal. What I’ve learned: · When people say “for better or worse,” they genuinely mean it and are committed to working through anything. However, sacrificing your own well-being is not healthy. · Feeling bullied, controlled, ignored, or misunderstood is a sign that the relationship isn’t healthy for you. · Staying together just for the kids can actually harm them more than help them. · Children need to see a model of a healthy, loving relationship to understand how to have one themselves. · The right partner inspires you to become a better person because you feel grateful to be with them. Just some thoughts to consider.

When it comes to divorce, half of the people involved will hear the news, while the other half will deliver it. Let's begin with what you should avoid doing! Many people handle this poorly. You can't predict how your spouse will react, especially if infidelity is involved, and this fear can lead to poor decisions. For instance, assuming that breaking the news in a public place will prevent an emotional outburst. In reality, telling your spouse in a public place means they will have to deal with their world falling apart in front of others. This conversation will bring out deep emotions that they may not even realize they have, making it even harder to handle in a public setting. So, what’s the best approach? There may not be a perfect one. This will be one of the hardest conversations you’ll ever have. Here are my best tips. 1) Ensure the kids are not around. This is a good time for them to have a sleepover with friends or spend the night with grandparents. You both need space to handle this situation. 2) Give your spouse time to process the news. The best approach is to say it simply and directly, then let them know you don't want to discuss anything immediately. Consider arranging to leave and spend the night elsewhere. This will be beneficial for both of you. 3) Break the news in person. Whatever you do, don't do it through a letter, email, or, worst of all, a text message. Have the courage to say it face-to-face. 4) Focus on your own feelings and decisions. Avoid attacking or using "you" statements. Here’s an example: “I have made a personal decision that I need to share with you. I can no longer stay in this marriage, and I believe it will be best for both of us to start the divorce process. The reasons aren’t important anymore. I just know that I need things to change. I understand this is a lot to take in, and it’s not a good idea to talk about it right now. I’ve arranged to stay somewhere else tonight so you can have some time to yourself. I’m really sorry.” Then quietly leave. It may not go perfectly, but it's a good way to start. 5) Ensure your safety. If there's any chance your spouse might react with anger or violence, have someone with you. They can wait by the front door while you talk to your spouse privately, and then you should leave right away. I understand this can be frightening, but you can't move forward with your life until you take this step.

Divorce can really mess with your mind. Trust me, I've seen it happen. The smart, organized woman you once were can turn into an emotional, confused mess. You try hard to stay strong, but you know this is not going to be one of your best moments. You want to sit down, get organized, and plan your future, but you feel paralyzed and stuck in a fog of indecision. So, what should you do? First, be honest with yourself. ADMIT WHAT YOU DON'T KNOW What's your role in managing the family finances? Do you pay the bills? Are you aware of your investment accounts, retirement plans, bank accounts, and other financial details, or are you in the dark? If you don't know much, you need to get informed quickly! If you and your spouse can cooperate, ask for statements of all your asset accounts and your most recent tax returns. Then, find a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst® to help you understand your finances. A CDFA® is trained in the financial aspects of divorce and will be incredibly helpful in clearing up your confusion. THINK ABOUT YOUR FUTURE It can be tough but start envisioning what the next phase of your life might look like. This means dealing with the grief of losing the future you had planned, but it can also be an exciting opportunity. You get to start fresh. Think about dreams you had that got lost while you were married. Is it time to go back to school? Maybe you want to trade the big family home for a cool downtown loft. Whatever your dreams, keep your budget and financial situation in mind. That’s why understanding your finances (as mentioned in the previous step) is so important – so your dreams can match your wallet! BUILD A SINGLE IDENTITY During marriage, most credit cards, mortgages, and loans are often in both spouses' names. After the divorce, these accounts need to be closed or converted. Your credit might not be as strong after the marriage ends, so it's crucial to take steps while you're still married. First, open a checking and savings account in your own name to start establishing your financial independence. Next, apply for a good rewards credit card in your name alone to ensure you have access to credit after the divorce, and maybe even during it if you need to cover legal fees. These steps might seem small, but they are essential first steps toward securing your financial future. You can get through this and having a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst® can be a great help.

When facing a significant life decision like divorce, consider what you find more valuable: someone who reassures you by saying nothing needs to change, or someone who presents the hard truths directly? I believe there's a shortage of divorce professionals who are willing to be completely honest. Many might tell you what you want to hear, which can lead to preventable and unnecessary mistakes. I provide straightforward guidance. When a couple's household income has to support two separate homes, changes are inevitable. Let me help you navigate these changes with some clear advice, ensuring you make smart decisions during this transition. I often encounter certain issues in divorce cases. People frequently agree to settlements, or a judge may order them, and then come to me confused and bewildered after the fact. When I review their decrees, I'm often left shaking my head in dismay. I urge you to avoid these common mistakes! Mistake #3: Ignoring tax implications in the settlement. It's common knowledge that taxes can significantly affect your finances. Never agree to a settlement without understanding its tax consequences. Often, people realize too late that the tax burden on their share of the marital assets is much higher than expected, reducing the value of what they receive. Importantly, don't assume your attorney will handle this aspect for you. Attorneys are not accountants or financial advisors, and many may not fully address the tax implications. Always exercise caution and consider consulting a financial expert. Mistake #2: Misunderstanding how pensions are divided. I frequently see divorce decrees mandating a 50/50 split of pensions, yet often neither party understands what this truly entails. Critical questions like when you can start collecting, whether there's an option for a lump sum, if the pension includes annual cost of living adjustments, and what happens to the pension if you or your spouse passes away are frequently left unanswered. It's essential to fully grasp these details before agreeing to a settlement, as they can significantly impact your retirement security. Do not rely solely on attorneys or mediators to clarify these points; it’s important to seek specific advice or conduct your own research. #1 – Drum Roll – The biggest mistake I see is keeping a house you can’t afford. I get that you might be emotionally attached to your family home and really want to stay. However, before you even think about this option, you need to create a budget. I also strongly recommend meeting with a financial planner. I've seen cases where, one or two years down the road, the spouse who "won the house" runs out of money. They can't sell a window to put food on the table, can't refinance because they don't have enough income, and end up having no choice but to sell the house. The selling costs are about 8% of the sale price – costs that would have been split 50/50 with the ex if the house had been sold during the divorce. It's a completely avoidable mistake. I understand that using terms like 'uninformed' might be more considerate than 'stupid' or 'ignorant'. But it's important to realize that everyone has blind spots. When it comes to your divorce, seeking the guidance of knowledgeable experts can help you navigate the process with confidence and wisdom. Remember, you don't have to face this alone. At Pathway Divorce Solutions we believe in getting it right the first time. Let us be there for you.