Divorce can really mess with your mind. Trust me, I've seen it happen. The smart, organized woman you once were can turn into an emotional, confused mess. You try hard to stay strong, but you know this is not going to be one of your best moments. You want to sit down, get organized, and plan your future, but you feel paralyzed and stuck in a fog of indecision.

So, what should you do?

First, be honest with yourself.

ADMIT WHAT YOU DON'T KNOW

What's your role in managing the family finances? Do you pay the bills? Are you aware of your investment accounts, retirement plans, bank accounts, and other financial details, or are you in the dark? If you don't know much, you need to get informed quickly! If you and your spouse can cooperate, ask for statements of all your asset accounts and your most recent tax returns. Then, find a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst® to help you understand your finances. A CDFA® is trained in the financial aspects of divorce and will be incredibly helpful in clearing up your confusion.

THINK ABOUT YOUR FUTURE

It can be tough but start envisioning what the next phase of your life might look like. This means dealing with the grief of losing the future you had planned, but it can also be an exciting opportunity. You get to start fresh. Think about dreams you had that got lost while you were married. Is it time to go back to school? Maybe you want to trade the big family home for a cool downtown loft. Whatever your dreams, keep your budget and financial situation in mind. That’s why understanding your finances (as mentioned in the previous step) is so important – so your dreams can match your wallet!

BUILD A SINGLE IDENTITY

During marriage, most credit cards, mortgages, and loans are often in both spouses' names. After the divorce, these accounts need to be closed or converted. Your credit might not be as strong after the marriage ends, so it's crucial to take steps while you're still married. First, open a checking and savings account in your own name to start establishing your financial independence. Next, apply for a good rewards credit card in your name alone to ensure you have access to credit after the divorce, and maybe even during it if you need to cover legal fees.

These steps might seem small, but they are essential first steps toward securing your financial future. You can get through this and having a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst® can be a great help.